I admit this post is not related to my usual topics, but it is one that is very personal to me today because in a way it is very related to what you do in life and the importance in being happy.
Yesterday, I was verbally abused by my boss over not having enough cups for a meeting. I was told I was horrible and that I caused more work for her, and pretty much 100% implied I was an idiot.
Here is the best part… She didn’t tell me these things personally she was screaming it to my immediate boss where I not only heard but a girl from another department heard… it was so bad my immediate boss had to tell her to close the door.
I don’t think she knows I heard but everyone in the office knows I heard and knows what happened so that makes it so much worse.
I was mortified and yes my pride was a little hurt but this morning I received a lot of perspective on not only this situation but life in general.
My job is not hard at all… I am still very new and I have been here for a few months & I really love everyone I work with… except her. I even love the organization that I work for as it truly makes a difference. I help those who are out there saving lives and changing lives. Since I can’t be on the front lines changing lives this is a close second and truly the best option for me right now.
Anyway I digress, I was upset, my pride was mangled and to be honest up until a couple weeks ago I thought everyone was happy with me. I misjudged her and that mistake will not happen again, when you learn an animal is a snake do you keep playing with it?
Another manager that knows about the entire situation and yes is 100% on my side about the lack of professionalism told me this:
“Don’t let anyone take your joy away as they are not the one that gave you joy to begin with”
As someone that always has something to say I was speechless. How many times in my life have I let someone take my joy away from me? Every time I was talked down to, made fun off… treated poorly?
They do not deserve that, nobody deserves that power over you.
Here is my takeaway,
I have also had a lot of things done to me and unfortunately I can’t control what people will say about me. I can’t control a person who lacks professionalism to handle something in a professional manner. I can’t control if a person makes fun of my shoes because they are not a high end designer or they make fun of my weight gain. I can’t control if someone feels I ruined their day because I didn’t order enough cups for a meeting. I can’t control how a person feels about me, I can’t change their perspective.
I can control how I handle the situation and I can control my emotions over it. Yes it hurts like hell & yes it was very hard to hear, but you know what I am very new at this job and yesterday I was told that I was very helpful in a very frustrating situation, I was also told yesterday by a different person they were happy I was there because I have made things so much smoother for them. Those are the things that matter, how I help vs what I do wrong.
I also realized that my goal is to teach in China and honestly this is a job to me and I don’t have much to loose. This is her life and she has everything to loose so maybe not having enough cups was something incredibly detrimental to her. Her life is this job my life is seeking joy and helping others and I will never let her upset me like that again.
So please takeaway this, if you are not living your best life please try to seek joy and find your best life, seek what makes you happy and strive for it daily. You may not always be successful and that is ok, we all have bad days and we can’t win them all, but we can control our days and focus on what makes us happy. We can make sure those who seek to destroy our happiness, don’t. Don’t let anyone have power over your happiness, seek joy and be happy in everything you do and do everything you can to live your best life, cause in the end that is what matters.