Category Archives: Movies The Ultimate Escape

Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: THE FATE OF THE FURIOUS

In a quick quarter mile of a sentence: if you’ve loved Fast Five and forward, you are going to love THE FATE OF THE FURIOUS (should’ve been title THE F8 OF THE FURIOUS, but whatever). The movie has incredible non-realistic yet kind of realistic action, funny comic-relief, a decent story, a much more utilized Jason Statham, a great villain in Charlize Theron, and plenty of  the word”family” to go around.

To be a little controversial, I even thought it was better than Furious 7. Yes, even with that Paul Walker tribute at the end. Out of all the fresh new ones (Fast Five forward), I always thought Furious 7 was good but a little incomplete and probably my least favorite of the revamped installment of the series. Not to diss on Paul Walker, because he is definitely missed in this installment, but with the last film, it bothered me when I could completely tell that he hardly filmed any scenes for the movie, and more than 50% of it was CGI or body doubles and edited in an awkward way to try and get people not to be able to tell it wasn’t him. Just felt like it was scrapped together really quickly when they probably should’ve taken a little bit more time to figure out how to write around his death.

The only weird edited thing this has is trying to keep Vin and Dwayne away from each other off set because of their ‘beef.’ Anyway, back to the movie. The only way you are going to love this film like I did is if you completely turn off your brain and just let whatever happen happen. Previous bad guy’s turning good even though they killed someone. Okay, I’ll bite (I completely still think that Han isn’t really dead). A sub missile skimming the ice and then Dwayne Johnson being able to steer it with his foot into a bad guy’s vehicle? Sure, why the hell not? A bunch of cars being hacked into all at once, falling out of buildings and also being able to drive side by side with computerized guidance systems? It wasn’t realistic but it sure was fucking awesome! This movie is completely Jeremy and outside vents in Divergent if he’s reading this. Jeremy, this movie would drive you nuts.

And why Dom is helping Cipher (Charlize Theron) and turns bad? I won’t ruin it here but it was not what I thought it would be. I just assumed she had Brian O’Connor held hostage off screen, but what they ended up doing surprised even me and wants to give screenwriter Chris Morgan a little more credit than I’ve given him.

I won’t ruin anymore of the actions scenes, but every single one of them is ingenious and very exciting. The film, even though they show a lot in the trailer, still has many twists, turns, cameos, and cool surprises. While new characters played by Scott Eastwood are okay but maybe will be fleshed out more later, returning characters like Kurt Russell make the movie cooler and more refreshing. The real two stars of the film are Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham. Their chemistry in this film is incredible, with Johnson getting the most screentime he has gotten in a Furious film, and Jason Statham getting to shine in this film when he should’ve shined in the last one as well but was very underused. A sequence with him on a plane is one of the highlights of the film.

There are some awkward unneeded parts, like Dwayne Johnson at his girls’ soccer game, they probably could’ve bene cut out, but all in all I really loved and enjoyed this film. Basically, if you can’t stand these films, this one won’t change your mind, but if you love them like I have, this one just keeps the franchise engine running full throttle without braking.

Ranking of Films:

Fast Five

Fast & Furious 6

The Fate of the Furious

Furious 7

The Fast and The Furious

Fast & Furious

The Fast & Furious: Tokyo Drift

2 Fast 2 Furious

Karate Kid (the new one)

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Country Set in: China
Summary: Work causes a single mother to move to China with her young son; in his new home, the boy embraces kung fu, taught to him by a master.

I am a fan of this series, I have one friend who refused to watch this movie, but I have always had an obsession and deep desire to go to China. Beautiful landscapes, ancient cultures, giants temples…. I really can’t explain how much I want to go to China. I am really hoping to get to China in the next couple of years but for now I will have to settle with films and books.

True story when this film came out I was scheduled to spend 17 days in China. I cancelled. It is by far my biggest regret in life. I did not go and it is ok to call me an idiot over that decision.

I found this movie fascinating and very cute. I could not imagine having my life up rooted and moved to such an exotic and different country at a young age. As an adult I would find that exciting but as a child I am sure it is overwhelming.

I found myself in love with this story, I could not stop watching. I wasn’t sure if it was really the story or my deep desire to go to China. It runs deep and still to this day I have no clue why I backed out of my trip of a lifetime.

Scene after scene my wanderlust for China was fueled and I can’t wait to finally experience my own China story.

I know the original Karate Kid has fueled a lot of people to not see this film but I urge you to watch it if you have not already, because it is giant insight to a country that had their borders closed for years, and still has a magical quality to it.

Go watch it now and imagine what your Chinese adventure would be like.

What I watched this weekend

This weekend was a pretty low key weekend.

First a slight confession, why have all my plans just been thrown out the window for 2015?  I recently found out that I need eye surgery.  My vision is horrible and has steadily gotten worse over the past year, it turns out that I have a cataract in both eyes.  I am 32, and there is not a cause for my cataracts.  It just happened.  which is odd and incredibly rare.

I do plan on writing a full post on this in the future but for now I am just mentioning it.

Anyway, why does this put a damper on my plans for 2015?  My insurance is horrible, while I am fortunate to have health insurance my total out of pocket cost is coming to roughly $8,500.  Which I don’t just have sitting around somewhere.  Soooooooooo I am being a grown up and staying my happy butt at home and saving money for the surgery which I hope to have on my left eye in June and my right eye in July.

While I am starting to get some serious stir fever I will say boredom has led me to watch some pretty interesting TV shows, which brings me back to the topic of this post.

What did Jen watch this weekend?

I have been on a HUGE Jane Austen kick lately.  So I figured I would watch some some Jane Austen themed movies and TV-shows.

So before I really get into the copious amount of TV I watched let me get this out of the way, my Jane Austen kick has not been good for my travel-lust.  I have never been to England but due to the vast amounts of TV, this has led me to pretty much tell JMM…. we need to go to London.  like now.

JMM has agreed, as long as I get my eyes fixed.  🙂

So without further ado, what did Jennifer watch this past weekend?

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Not Another Teen Movie.

Mom and I had just bought our advance screening tickets, and were in an Avenger’s kick. Me having a slight obsession crush on Chris Evans I really wanted to watch Captain America The Winter Solider, but alas I did something to the blu-ray player and well this would not come to pass… so what do I do?  Watch another Chris Evans movie, mom had never seen it, and we laughed a lot.  It is absolutely hilarious that the main character would grow up to be Captain America.   You just never know.

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Lost In Austen

I couldn’t sleep, like at all this weekend.  So when I came across this series for about $5 on Amazon prime I went ahead and bought the season (before you start getting on em about money I have a gift card balance on Amazon).  This was delightfully addicting.  I enjoyed every minute and it got me to thinking, what if something like this would occur?  If one event changed what would have been the outcome of the story.  This was a very cute & short miniseries, that I know I will be able to watch in the future again and really enjoy.  Not to mention if you have seen the Colin Firth version of Pride and Prejudice I promise you will find this hilarious and one scene in particular will make you laugh out loud.  Promise.  Don’t worry I won’t spoil for you.

 

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Sense and Sensibility

Last month when I read this story I enjoyed it.  It wasn’t my favorite but I did enjoy the story.  It was a nice insight into the Regency era and the choices made.  Plus it seemed the most relevant today.  How often have you heard about a person not getting their inheritance because of broken promises?  This was a charming movie and I really enjoyed watching this cuddled up with my little puppy Splinter.

The-Lizzie-Bennet-Diaries

The Lizzie Bennet Diaries 

This was fun.  A lot of fun.  It takes a very modern and fresh twist on the classic love story.  This wasn’t quite what I expecting but as I started watching I really started to enjoy it.  It is on youtube so no reason to purchase like I did, but I did enjoy the v-log approach. I also will say that it was nice to watch on Amazon because it grouped the videos together, vs having to watch one at a time.  It was a very fresh and modern twist, and I can see why it won an Emmy.   I loved this series and will watch again,

So there you go, that is my weekend round up of what I watched.  I am thinking about giving Mansfield Park a go soon.  I am not sure just yet, but I can tell you seeing all these movies in the lush green country side of Britain is making me want to pack a bag grab my passport and head out… after I get eye surgery of course.

What did you watch this weekend?  What should I watch next?

Sharknado 2: A review

I must confess I am Shark Disaster Movie Addict.

I apologize for nothing.

I love the bad special effects, the bad acting, the bad everything.

I loved Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus.  I loved Two Headed Shark Attack. I loved Snow Shark.

I really loved Sharknado. So last year when I learned about this movie.  I was stoked.

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So when it was time to watch Sharknado 2, I was 100% on board.  I convinced my dad it was the best junk food for the brain and for 2 hours you won’t think about anything except sharks

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Last year when Sharknado took twitter by storm I was excited because FINALLY I would have people that got “the disaster” shark movie genre.

I could talk to people about Sharknado and not get weird looks.  (Seriously when I talk about Mega Shark peopled looked at me like I was a compete psycho)

Spoilers ahead, but believe me they won’t ruin the  movie for you.  You really have to watch it to really enjoy it for all of it’s glory.

This movie was so deliciously bad for you that instead of being a sane rational person and quit after the commericial break you just hung around to see what was next.  Something this bad for you has to be good for you too right?

There were chainsaws for a hand, there were sharks flying through the air.

There was even a scene that Tara Reid was trying to convince  “Fin” the shark was after her for revenge.

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Say what? Did I start watching the remake of Jaws The Revenge?

The plot was practically the same as the first one, except let me just tell you unlike the folks from LA, the New York mayor made it know that was LA this is NYC and we don’t take no sh*t.   When the mayor said that I couldn’t help it, I was rolling in laughter.   Next thing I know there are people in the streets of NYC (where you can’t find guns by the way) carrying machine guns (and firing them into the air like we were on the set of rambo), pitchforks, shovels.

Cause a shovel totally can knock a shark out by the way.   Didn’t you know?

There really is not much of a plot.  Sorry there wasn’t.  (Hope you were not expecting one!) but if we ever have a Sharknado I just hope I get to ride a shark down the tornado like Fin did.  Cause yeah, that would be epic, and my life would be complete.

I would most likely be dead, but at least that is one epic way out of this life.

Guys do yourself a favor and go snag a little junk food that is Sharknado.

PS:  I love how Will Wheaton had a “Sharknado 2” audition in The Big Bang Theory and bailed on Penny… only to really be in Sharknado 2.

What were your thoughts on Sharknado?  What was your favorite scene.